Friday, January 12, 2018

A Haunting

Reading friends! My amazing wife is now a published writer of things! A Haunting is a collection of original poetry and artwork from a very dark period in the younger life of Meg House-Valdez. (This is VERY different from the lighthearted silliness that I write) Paperback, 116 pages. Now available at Amazon and Barnes & Noble.

You can also email myself or Meg to order a SIGNED copy directly from us!

Sunday, December 31, 2017

Author Lang Syne

Should failed plot lines be forgot,
and never brought to mind?
Should bad review pains be forgot,
and auld lang syne?

For auld lang syne, my dear,
for auld lang syne,
we'll take another edit yet,
for auld lang syne.

And surely you’ll take critique well!
and surely I’ll take mine!
And we'll take another edit yet,
for auld lang syne.


We two have wrote our share of tropes,
and cringe-inducing lines;
But we’ve wandered many a weary pen,
since auld lang syne.


We two have swam the blogosphere,
with critics harsh and kind;
But hater tears upon we've gorged
since auld lang syne.


And there’s a hand my trusty friend!
And give me a hand o’ thine!
And we’ll say "fuck off" to our self doubt,
for auld lang syne.



Happy New Year,  readers, writers, everyone! Whether you care to make resolutions or not, I wish you all the best of times to come.

And now, one more thing, from a much more prolific writer than I:

"I hope that in this year to come, you make mistakes.

Because if you are making mistakes, then you are making new things, trying new things, learning, living, pushing yourself, changing yourself, changing your world. You're doing things you've never done before, and more importantly, you're Doing Something.

So that's my wish for you, and all of us, and my wish for myself. Make New Mistakes. Make glorious, amazing mistakes. Make mistakes nobody's ever made before. Don't freeze, don't stop, don't worry that it isn't good enough, or it isn't perfect, whatever it is: art, or love, or work or family or life.

Whatever it is you're scared of doing, Do it.

Make your mistakes, next year and forever."

-Neil Gaiman (originally posted on his blog, here)

Here's to another year of beautiful mistakes.


Sunday, December 24, 2017

'Twas The Night Before Daxmas

’Twas the night before Christmas, and all of that crap
Commander Dax Harrison was caught in a trap
And SAMM hanging clueless in low-power rest
Was no help at all with their unwelcome guest

Dax woke with a daze, head ringing like a bell
Tied up on the bridge and confused as all hell
When, what to his wondering eyes should appear,
But a space pirate jackass, perusing his beer

"What the hell is this?!" Dax said in a huff
"A robbery, Commander. I’m taking your stuff."
Dax glared at the intruder and reached for his hip
And the thief gave a laugh that rang through the ship

Dax’s gun rested in a belt near his crotch
And now the rat bastard was taking his scotch!
"Come on man, it’s Christmas. I was saving that," Dax pled
"What for? Just yourself? That’s pathetic," he said

It was true, Dax was all by himself on this night
With not even a Yuletide one-night-stand found in sight
Though he’d never admit it, he felt it to the bone
For all his fame, Dax spent most Christmases alone

"What a dump!" The thief barked, and Dax took offense
To him, the ship was as home as a white picket fence
"Where’s all the shiny? All the creds? All the loot?"
"In banks," Dax laughed. "You think I stuff it in my boot?"

"Enough," said the pirate. "I’m taking your ship!"
And Dax lost all care to reply with a quip
He thought perhaps maybe the thief would see reason
What better time to try than the holiday season?

"Look, take the booze. I’ve got some to spare.
How ’bout we part ways and get out of each other’s hair?"
"How ’bout I space you?" He resolved with murderous glee
But then Dax cracked a smile. "No please, allow me."

As the thief pondered Dax’s sheer lack of defeat
The Commander watched SAMM’s startup sequence complete
"SAMM!" Dax shouted. "WE GOT A CODE BLACK!"
And he grabbed something sturdy as the thief was yanked back

Away through the airlock he flew like a flash,
As the sudden change in pressure made the whole damn ship thrash
The moon shining brightly on the jettisoned pirate’s face
Gave a small twinkling lustre in Martian colonial space

The A.I. worked swiftly and resealed the door
And Dax’s dinner settled after a brief internal war
"Commander," SAMM posed. "Have you tried making friends?
You might spend Christmas NOT dodging untimely ends."

Dax considered this a moment, but concluded instead:
"Merry Christmas, Sammy. I’m going back to bed."

Merry Christmas & Happy Holidays to all! Here’s to a lovely year in books and many more to come! By the way, if you would like to give a humble fledgling author a small gift, a review on Amazon goes a long way! Also, you can now order personally signed copies of the book directly at (I still have a few extras on hand!)

See ya next year!

Sunday, December 10, 2017

Christmas in a Mysterious Galaxy

Yesterday was the holiday party at Mysterious Galaxy BookStore in San Diego! And apparently they let just about anyone in there. Look! Here's some silly sci-fi writer peddling his wares...

Surprise! It's me.

Sunday, December 3, 2017

Next Stop, San Diego! (12/9/17)

Hey there, readers!

Look at this snake oil salesman over here!

Despite my battling the start of a nasty head cold, yesterday’s signing event at Barnes & Noble went pretty damn good! I sold a decent stack of books, chatted with some cool people, and probably drank an unsafe-for-humans amount of coffee. Special thanks to everyone who came by, and to the awesome BN staff that let me set up shop for the day.

Thursday, November 30, 2017

Barnes & Noble Book Signing! (12/2/17)


This Saturday, December 2nd, I’ll be signing books at Barnes & Noble Fullerton! I’ll be starting at 9:30AM and hanging out through the morning hours. (Or until they say "TAKE A HIKE, YOU BUM!") Come say hi, bring your book, or grab one in-store and I’ll sign it! Anyone who buys a copy can enter to win a FREE poster print of the spectacular cover art! (Originally oil painted by Jessica R. Van Hulle)

This also coincides with B&N's Educator Holiday Shop. All day, Pre-K through Grade 12 educators will receive a 25% discount throughout the store! As if you needed another reason to stop by...


Barnes & Noble Fullerton
1923 W Malvern Ave, Fullerton, CA 92833


Wednesday, November 8, 2017